The paper chronicles...

...so, I've been seeing a lot of fun paper crafts on the blogs lately and have tucked them away in my little head thinking "I can do that!"  Really, I didn't think I could.  Some of them appear to involve math skills and I am sorely lacking in those very types of things, so I did my usual.  I bought all the supplies I would need, set them on the craft table or somewhere thereabouts, and then promptly forgot about it. 

A few weeks ago I decided that this was becoming a foolish habit and something had to give.  So I chose to try making a wreath out of paper cones.  Sounds strange but it ended up being so easy that I'm embarrassed, well almost embarrassed, to admit it.  There are many tutorials out there on how to make these paper wreaths and I won't bore you with details. I'm pretty sure you know how to Google if you want details.

I found a book of sheet music a few months ago at the thrift and proceeded to tea stain them.  This was for another mislaid project but worked well here.  The pages were about 10 1/2 by 7 inches, so I cut several, many, 7" squares.  Then with the leftover piece I cut it in half which was 3 1/2 inches.  Basically you need a square sheet for this project and I don't think the actual size matters....as you will see!

Next I rolled the squares into cones and adhered them with clear tape, I think you could use tacky-glue but I didn't want to sit holding the edges together all night so I opted for tape.  You won't see it later.  In the above picture you can see I rolled all the papers but am only using the smaller 3 1/2 inch cones for this wreath.  After all the cone rolling, which is mindless fun, really, I cut out a piece of light weight cardboard.  I used a cereal box and cut a circle 5" in diameter.  I then found the 'middle' of the circle and marked it with a pencil.  This will be the center point in which all the cones come together.  Taking the small ends of the cones, one at a time, I glued the bottom half of the cone on the underside and attached it to the circular piece.  Around and around fanning the cones out until you have something like this.

When the cones were all attached and dried I then added a little Spanish moss to the middle to cover up the center spot.  I've seen other people use rosettes and other types of bling on theirs but I decided to go more natural.  Also, some of the examples had glittered edges, slightly torn edges, and/or curled edges to add to the aged look.  Then all you need to do is glue on some ribbon, string, or twine to the back and let it dry.  I also cut another sheet of music paper in a 5" round to cover the back side.

It isn't perfect but it was easy and fun and besides perfect is highly over-rated!  I have mine hanging in the kitchen and from a distance it reminds me of a giant Dahlia.  So what do you think?



Monday's snap...

of the over
200
photos taken yesterday
at our
family Thanksgiving
not
one
was
of
food!

more to come when I come out of my turkey coma.

finding purpose...

...I hope you all enjoyed your Thanksgiving holiday. I am struggling a little right now but that is not unusual for a holiday.  This is the first one since I decided (last summer) that I could not, for my own healths sake, endure the madness of our extended family.   I ran across this today on FB and thought that it was quite appropriate for the season...

I will be back Monday with pictures of our get-together tomorrow.  Happy Sunday!

while their houses laid unbuilt....

...the pilgrims managed to set aside a day of giving thanks.

"Gratitude unlocks the fullness of life. It turns what we have into enough, and more. It turns denial into acceptance, chaos into order, and confusion into clarity. ... It turns problems into gifts, failures into success, the unexpected into perfect timing, and mistakes into important events. Gratitude makes sense of our past, brings peace for today and creates a vision for tomorrow."
Melodie Beattie

Wishing all of my family and friends a wonderful Thanksgiving.  Travel safe, be warm, share in the delight of the day.  May you and yours be Blessed with the joy of being expected.   Happy Thanksgiving.

On a side note;  There will only be two of us at this holiday table this year as our children will be visiting with their in-laws.  As it so happens our wedding anniversary falls on this day of thanks and so as we started out as two, we will celebrate our 38th year of marriage as two and toast each other to many, many more filled with love, laughter, patience, friendship, smiles, tears and immeasurable joy.

Give me five...

...it's been on my mind a lot.  Thanksgiving.  Did you know that the Pilgrims made seven times more graves than houses?  Even in the midst of their impoverished existence they still found the time to be grateful.  They still were able to set apart a day of thanks.

I admit I try to be grateful when things are going well.  It's easy to give thanks for the everyday luxuries that we take for granted...a home, food, a car, clothes, pets.  And of course we always say thanks for our family and friends.  But when times are difficult how often do we set aside a time to give thanks?  Not for the difficult times but for the gifts we have been given during those times, the ones that get us through, the simplest of joys.

I took a moment today to stop and think...actually dig down deep in my heart and give gratitude for the more unusual gifts in my life.

My parents;  even though they raised me during the turbulent 60's they still managed to teach me respect, for myself and others.  They taught me faith and gave me an exemplary example of what a good marriage should be.  I never told them how much I appreciated all they gave up for me, all they did for me.  They didn't have it easy and yet they instilled a sense of values and family to their children that lives on and on.  Thank you Pop and TT.

Waldorf salad and stuffed dates;  two of my favourite holiday dishes, handmade by my mother whose wretched arthritic hands could barely hold a knife.  It was truly a treat that was made with love and something I enjoy even now.  If I close my eyes I can picture her rolling those walnut stuffed dates in powdered sugar and laying them on a crystal dish.  I used to bring home the leftover salad and dates and eat them for breakfast the next day!

The secret stuffing recipe;  for years and years after my folks died I tried and tried to make the family stuffing recipe.  Year after year I failed.  I could not figure out what I was doing wrong.  It seems that my mother never wrote down the recipe but my brother was able to get it out of her, and he wisely wrote it down.  It seems the secret to her stuffing and my downfall was something as simple as poultry seasoning.  I've got it now!

Health;  even though I have a lack of it I am quite happy to have any at all.  Things are not easy with this disease and it's horrible complications but so far we have managed to get through it together.  When one person in the family has a disease the entire family has a disease and if we don't work together then it will be me against the world.  I am stable and for now that is more than I can expect or hope for.

Turner Movie Classics;  I'm a night owl.  Getting to bed before 3am is an early night for me.  That's probably why I enjoy naps so much!  And I love TMC...classic movies from the 40's are the best in my book and a great way to spend the late night sitting next to my hubby while he sleeps in front of the t.v...we don't have a television in our bedroom so we just sit up all night long with the classics!

So how about you...can you dig down deep in your heart and share an unusual blessing?

If it's Friday it must be Maude(day)...

...this is our sweet punky Maude at 9 months.
as you can see
she rarely slows down enough to take her picture.
no naps for this girl.
no sleeping through the night for this girl.
she just might miss something important
if she were to close those
big hazel eyes for just
one
moment.

Poppa and I (nie, as loud as you can scream it)
are so fortunate
to be able to spend a few hours
alone
with Maude on Fridays.
Her mama doesn't have help on that day
and even though she works
from home
the little one can keep her too busy.
so
lucky us!
It is such a special time
and one that I cherish more than words can describe.

So long ago,
when I was diagnosed with
type 1 diabetes
I was told by the doctors that
I would not live to see
30.
I prayed every day
(and still do)
that I would be
Blessed
beyond my understanding
and able to share in the lives of
my
grandbabies.
I am so thankful.

The mysterious Mama Pajama...



...In a recent post I alluded to "Mama Pajama," and a few people asked/commented/e-mailed me wondering what/who/where that is.   

For those of you who have been with me awhile you know that I suffer from clinical depression.  With medication and lots of vitamins and light I am usually able to keep it controllable.  Though in doing so I often lose a part of myself...it's like pushing down one thing to keep from feeling another if that makes any sense at all.  And I have no doubt that it makes little sense to anyone who has not suffered with depression.

I am not talking about the blue days we all have or the down times we experience occasionally. Nor am I talking about Seasonal Affective Disorder, although I am quite sensitive to light changes.  I am talking about the soul sucking, life draining, all enveloping darkness that comes to stay, sets up camp, and won't leave...ever.  The kind of darkness where you can see a light, oh so far away and so very, very small, but you have no way of moving toward it.  No way of climbing up, over or out.  And the days go on and on and slowly turn into a nightmare and you begin to wonder if there might be another way out.

There is always a way out right?

I have named her "Mama Pajama," since all I want to do is stay in my pajamas, crawl in a hole and block everything else out of my mind, and my mind's eye.  I have known her many, many years and I suspect that she often controlled my mother and my sister.  (Though in those days it was never spoken of and, heaven forbid, treated.)

In the last few years and with the help of blogger, I have learned to make friends with Mama Pajama.  I know when she is near, I know her knock at the door...after all she does have manners!  I know what to expect and finally, finally, I know how to cope.  It is not easy and takes a lot of work to keep her at bay.  It takes constant vigilance and much help from those closest to me.  But I know, and I always will, that it is a slippery slope and that at any moment I can be shoved over the edge into the darkness again.  I can't ever let my guard down...and it is exhausting.

So when and if I reference dear old "Mama P" you know that she is coming down the street with her eye on my home ready to crash in and suck the life and light out of me.    Guards up though and the security light is on...

Thursday's thought...

In this world,

full often,

our joys are only the tender shadows

which our sorrows cast.

Henry Ward Beecher

Choosing to see the joy in the shadows today.  There is always something to be grateful for, so in the month of Gratitude I challenge you to look into the shadows of your own life

and choose to see the joy.

Tuesday's tid-bits...

...it's been quite awhile since we stopped for a moment and took a little peek inside my pretty little head to see what is floating around amongst all the noise and clatter.

So here we go, from yellow doors to mama pajama.

I can't believe I painted my front door yellow aka "squash blossom."  Every time the car pulls away from the house I think...who does that?  Anyway, it's going to take a little getting used to.  As for now I feel I need to dress it up with something so it's a good deal that it's wreath season.

While perusing the DIY blogs I continue to see so many crafty ideas that for a moment I forget that I am not a crafter.  I will get it into my head that "I can do that," and order the supplies or ask hubs to take me to the craft store or worse ask him to go there for me.  Then with supplies in hand I will head down to the craft room, put the bag down and immediately forget about it.  A few weeks later the process starts all over again.  The bags of supplies are starting to take over so I have determined to do something about it.  Stay tuned because I'm gonna do a crafty thing.

And yes.  I'm not a crafty person but I have a craft room.

I did not have good news at the foot doctor today.   No steps forward and small steps back.  I can increase my time weight-bearing but only because things can't and won't get better.  Next week I will go in and have a cast made so that he can figure out some sort of permanent 'shoe' for me to wear during the day and then use the moon boot at night.    I am considering having a pity party for one, can't bring the house down you know.

Despite all my best efforts Mama pajama has been knocking at the door hoping to come in and stay for an extended visit.  For those of you who don't know about mama pajama consider yourselves lucky.  I wish I didn't know her too.

I will explain all of this later after I figure it all out myself!  Happy Tuesday y'all.

Let's make a deal...

...I remember that game show so well.  With Monty Hall as the host and all the contestants dressed up in their most imaginative outfits, deal or no deal, and finally at the end, the three doors.  What awaits the winner behind door number 1, number 2 or door number 3?  I was always quite inept at picking the correct door ending up with a years supply of chicken soup or a frying pan.  Do you remember?

Recently, at the height of my 'duffiness,'  I began to notice our front door.  Blah, blue.  Nothing wrong with blue but it was painters grade fifteen years ago and was starting to look rather shabby.  So I did what every DIY (in her mind) girl does and perused all the wonderful home improvement blogs that I could find.  Oh my, that it itself is a post for another day!   Such talent and beauty as far as the eye can see.  But, I digress....

I wanted something different, something no one else in the neighborhood had, something bold, that screamed "that nut J lives there!"  And well, well...what do you think?

old tired blue door begging for a make-over

first of two coats of primer.   And then after three coats of paint and another coat of a different colour paint we have:

a YELLOW front door.  Technically it is called "Squash Blossom" by Dutch Boy.  It has the primer built in but It wasn't enough to cover the blue.   Not only that but this job was done by me...on my duff, with a paint stick in hand and the help of a sponge brush.    (Oh yeah, and I totally remembered to take the making tape off around the lock.)

the bitter and the sweet...

...while this is a re-post from a couple years ago, and though I am not literally walking down these lovely Fall roads, the sentiment remains the same.

November's lonely roads...

...it was a cool, crisp, clear Autumn day here today so we got out of the house and took a little walk to the river.                      

I welcome  every other month of the year with joy and anticipation of what will come.  Not so, with November.  I feel nothing less than trepidation wrapped up in it's thirty days.

November holds days of incredible joy, family celebrations and anniversaries.  November  holds a day of unspeakable, unbearable, heart-wrenching, soul-bleeding grief.  The day my life as I knew it...stopped.  A day that holds a child's death. My firstborn son.

I know what to expect these next few weeks, I have been doing it far too long now.  I know the days will feel long, and the darkness will be heavy and deep.  I know the sadness and the searing anger will be burdensome.  But in the end, I know, there will be light and a baby's cry for his mama in my heart.

Wishing you sunshine for your soul, laughter for your heart, and peaceful November days...