"the nicest and the sweetest days are not those on which anything very splendid or wonderful or exciting happens, but just those that bring simple pleasure, following one another softly, like pearls slipping off a string."
Lucy Maud Montgomery

Friday, May 20, 2016

distractify...phase one

...meaning; to do whatever it takes to distract Joanne from the untimely surgery and recovery she is about to undergo.  To maintain her indelible spirit and strength...and maybe make her feel a little lighthearted for just a moment.  Give it all you got...

We have always been stewards of planet Earth, always recycling, reusing and whatever the other 're' is.  When our children were growing up they would do the recycling of household goods, cans, bottles, cardboard etc, and once monthly we would load it up and take it to our local recycling center.  At that time the center would pay for our efforts by the pound (now they just take it and charge you).  The kiddies would 'earn' the money and split it being allowed to buy whatever they wanted.  This was usually just a few dollars and would often go for treats such as ice cream, soda or candy, none of which were bought on a regular basis or kept in the house.

 Recently I came across a site Globein.  It carries hand made items from all over the world and your monthly 'gift' to them helps support education in faraway lands.  In return you receive a small gift in a hand-made basket, the perfect size for re-gift giving.  The first month I was gifted a small bowl, hand-painted in blues and yellow.  Last month a beautiful towel with delicate embroidery on the edges, from India.  This month, well this month they took recycling to a whole new level...well, well just see for yourself;
(click on the photo to enlarge)

There you have it friends,  a notebook made from recycled elephant pooh!  You can't get much more unique than that.  This really made my day, on a day when I needed a chuckle.  I just may keep my surgery 'notes' in this one.

Monday, May 9, 2016

coming clean...

...it has not been an easy path these last few months.  I had every intention of blogging more and complaining less and neither has happened.  I also had high hopes that the end of 2015 would be the end of some very difficult problems but as it turns out it was only the beginning.  You see, I've been holding out on you, afraid to let you in on my secret, trying to find the way out of the maze on my own; the only thing I've learned is that I can't do this on my own.

I have always tried to be up front with my type 1 diabetes fight of almost 50 years and some of it's nastier complications that come with time of illness.  I have tried to be honest with my struggles with depression in case someone else could benefit from my honesty.  But I hold back, always, for if you knew the 'real' struggles you would hurt yourself in my name.  We are all like that I fear, holding back just enough to survive.  I am no different and I know you all have your own battle scars.

See this beautiful illustration of two lovely, healthy kidneys;

these are not my kidneys, if they were we would not be having this conversation, I could wish you all a wonderful week and say good-night but alas, this is not so.

I always thought that type 1 diabetes would be the culprit, would take out my kidneys as it does so many others.  It is the leading cause of kidney failure and something that is always back in the windmills of my mind.  My kidney function remains remarkably good considering.  No it wasn't diabetes it is something completely unexpected especially at this point in my life.  I have kidney cancer.  I have borne this news alone for a few months while going through test after test and after seeing three doctors they all seem to be of the same opinion...cancer, both kidneys.

I must be some mutant child as there is no known diabetes or kidney cancer in the family although thyroid cancer is something both my sis and I have had and this is related to that.  I saw a surgeon last week and we have a plan.  The original surgeon recommended having both kidneys removed as the mass in each kidney is quite large, then I would need a transplant or dialysis.  I didn't like that idea at all.  New surgeon is going to try and save as much of the kidneys as possible hoping that the left over portions will do the job and keep me from more surgery or dialysis.  This sounds a little better, still in all it's major surgery...and soon.

shocked, numb, pissed, sad, relieved, wanting to hug everyone I see, spend time in nature, and find some healing place, putting my trust in the good Lord to guide me and the doctors, wanting to 'help' my hubby cope (this doesn't help his Parkinson's) wanting to run away, needing an umbrella drink or two, wanting more special days with my babies and their babies, so many thoughts jumble my mind all at the same time.....

My dear bloggy friends you have always been there for me and welcomed me with open arms when I started this crazy blog and I know you are there for me now, that you will hold me up and help me through and for that I am so very grateful.  I will do my best to keep you updated and if not me then my girl will step in.  For now I will try to keep on as if life is normal and drop in here when I can.  Love you all.
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